Punk Ass: Biker, Zen Stress Monkey
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
First you say it, then you do it....
So, I was cruising down I-90 on my way into work this morning (Oh BTW, it's I-90, not "THE" I-90) and suddenly up ahead I see break lights, and cars swerving as if to avoid something in the road. When I made it up to that spot, sure enough, huge freekin pieces of truck tire all over the road.
The next thing I see is a cement mixer pulled off into the breakdown lane, sans one of it's rear tires and listing like a drunken water buffalo.
Next, about 100 feet ahead of said truck, I see a Honda Accord pulled over. As I pass it, I see that the whole drivers side of the wind shield is smashed. Using my fiendishly clever powers of deduction, I reason that this poor sucker must have been right behind the truck when it went critical. Then I see the driver of the Honda standing a few feet in front of his car on his cell phone pacing back and forth. As he turns his back to me, continuing to yammer away and wave his free arm, that's when I see the worst part of this whole tragic story: The poor bastard has actually and quite literally shit himself. And just to make it all the more obvious, had the misfortune of choosing to wear light coloured Dockers today.
How much fear I ask you, does it take to get one to lose control of ones own ass?
Man and I thought my day started off bad by stepping in a pool of cold kitty puke on my way to the shower this morning. I got jack compared to that guy.....
So, I was cruising down I-90 on my way into work this morning (Oh BTW, it's I-90, not "THE" I-90) and suddenly up ahead I see break lights, and cars swerving as if to avoid something in the road. When I made it up to that spot, sure enough, huge freekin pieces of truck tire all over the road.
The next thing I see is a cement mixer pulled off into the breakdown lane, sans one of it's rear tires and listing like a drunken water buffalo.
Next, about 100 feet ahead of said truck, I see a Honda Accord pulled over. As I pass it, I see that the whole drivers side of the wind shield is smashed. Using my fiendishly clever powers of deduction, I reason that this poor sucker must have been right behind the truck when it went critical. Then I see the driver of the Honda standing a few feet in front of his car on his cell phone pacing back and forth. As he turns his back to me, continuing to yammer away and wave his free arm, that's when I see the worst part of this whole tragic story: The poor bastard has actually and quite literally shit himself. And just to make it all the more obvious, had the misfortune of choosing to wear light coloured Dockers today.
How much fear I ask you, does it take to get one to lose control of ones own ass?
Man and I thought my day started off bad by stepping in a pool of cold kitty puke on my way to the shower this morning. I got jack compared to that guy.....
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